One Last Hurrah

So I've been M.I.A. for the past few days, which probably isn't the best practice when you're just starting a blog, but I had to get away for a few days with my beloved corn. Yes, beloved. See I've been sitting on this experiment for about a week now, and as I've said before, there's many a food today that has the good ole kernel in it. And the more I think about, the more research I do, the more I realize that corn and its assorted parts are all over the freakin' place. So I ran away with corn for a "hominy-moon", if you will (and we will) to Charleston, South Carolina where I ate corn in its many various reincarnations. I ate cornbread, I ate BBQ sauce that I'm sure had some high fructose corn syrup in it, I ate fresh corn, and I even had a brunch that consisted entirely of corn in the forms of peach corn cakes with a side of grits.

If corn and I were going down, we were going down in flames, baby.

See that cornbread in the basket? When that cornbread was brought up to our table and served to Adam and I, it was like being presented with someone's beautiful new baby in a bassinet. I just wanted to ooh and ahh at it, tickle it under its chin, tell it I loved it. Okay, its weird, I know, but cornbread is good. Reallll good. And though I don't get cornbread as good as THAT, really, ever, outside of Charleston (based on personal experience - no offense to cornbread masters out there), I won't be eating cornbread of any variety for the next year, so that cornbread looked insanely perfect.

Anywho, I'll try to keep the cracked out corn comments to a minimum. But its day 1 (as of an hour or so ago) so I must warn you, there are probably lots (Scratch that "many" more to come).

So yes, I had a last tango in Charleston with El Corno. And it was good. Grand, in fact. But it was along I-95 in the few 3G areas between Charleston and Charlottesville, that I learned the terrible news about some things that almost seem like necessities in my day to day. Namely, gum. Yes, no more gum for me for the next year. Shiotttt. It looks like I might be brushing my teeth more than usual for a while. Which is fine, I mean brushing is better than chewing, even if it is sugar-free. And my jaw can use the rest.

Yes, for the next however long this lasts (umm, the year goal is getting thrown out there a little less often), I will be the cool girl carrying around awesome individual toothpaste packets likes these gems. Thank goodness, I can get a case of 1000 of them for a mere $150.

Now, hopefully toothpaste is corn-free.

More deceivingly corn filled foods to come in the next few days. Too tired tonight. Must get lots of sleep (I actually started to write corn instead of sleep...I'm already losing it!) to battle the evils of chemical corn derivatives tomorrow.

-Jess

Second Thoughts???

So my boyfriend seems to think I'm biting off more than I can chew. And the more I let my new experiment sink into my head, the more scared I get. Because yes, I'd already thought of high fructose corn syrup and a lot of what that means (at least what I think what that means). Damn, I typed "a lot" again. I don't even realize! Maybe I should try to give up "a lot" before I give up corn.

My bf, being the nice guy that he is, pointed out that there's all these corn derivatives out there, like xanthum gum. Crap. Hmmph. This from the guy who is in the middle of a cleanse right now. I think someone is just hungry and trying to bring me down.
So not only do I have to look for the word "corn" on labels but now I have to get a chemistry degree to figure out what chemicals have corn in it! Do artificial colors have corn in it? Not that I feel like I eat a lot, errrm, many artificially colored foods, but I'm sure there are some that sneak into there.
This experiment is already reminding me of one of my very favorite movies, Mean Girls, specifically the scene where Regina George (Rachel McAdams) is at the lunch table asking Katy Heron (Lindsay Lohan) what foods have carbs in it. I'm going to be the girl sitting there asking Adam, and anyone else who will listen to me (or just pretend to, as I think the case with him may sometimes be) if this has corn in it or not. Maybe I'll lose weight. "I only want to lose 3 pounds" (Mean Girls quote....if you havent seen Mean Girls its a must. Soooo much like Food, Inc). Maybe I'll shed those last few corn pounds. Maybe I'll discover the cause of American obesity!
Actually I think some people have already cited high fructose corn syrup as one of the causes. Maybe I'll start a new diet plan! I'm energized! I haven't begun yet! I just had coffee!
Sounds like its going to be a fun year!!!!
Fudge nugs, this is going to be hard.
-Jess

Flash of Genius

BLOG WARNINGS: 1) I write side thoughts in parentheses...A LOT.
2) I will try from now on to refrain from using "a lot". High school English teacher and all around bad ass, Jessica Good, used to say "a lot is place you park your car, not a unit of measure", which has since then left me trying to figure out what the heck you say instead.
3) To Mrs. Good, I'm sorry for all the grammatical errors. I've already realized that I really don't remember if movies get italicized or put in quotes. So please overlook this, and other English errors in this blog. I really did learn alot, scratch that, a ton?, ummm, multitudes of important English facts? in the 3 years I had you as a teacher. Oh yes, I'm not very liberal with my spaces around my commas.
4) Everytime I write Food, Inc you must drink.


Okay, so maybe the title, "Flash of Genius" is a little bit of an exaggeration (considering I had to look up "genius" just to make sure I was spelling it correctly, and yes, I had it right), but I just saw Food, Inc and Bam! (Emeril style) got hit with the flash within the first 3o minutes of the movie.

Before I continue, a little background on me. My name is Jessica...let's get more personal, Jess. I'm 25. I'm a graduate of the University of Virginia, and I still live in Charlottesville, Virginia (they don't call it "The Hook" for nothing, ya know?). I'm a vegetarian (3 years strong). I'm the co-founder of Locallectual (www.locallectual.com ...had to get a plug in here somewhere), a web directory to find locally and domestically made products, producers, and foods in your area, restaurants using local ingredients in your area, and local retailers selling all this good stuff. So obviously, I'm into movies like Food, Inc because I care about where my food comes from (reason #1 for being a vegetarian) and I'm into supporting local food systems and not big monsters like Conagra and its cohorts.

So to continue, obviously I would go to Food, Inc and obviously, I'd be very moved. But I wasn't quite expecting to be moved like this. Yes, to be perfectly honest, I expected to walk out giving myself a little pat on the back for conceiving (had to look that word up...damn you, "i" before "e" except after "c") Locallectual, and I did (thanks for the little "eat local foods, shop your local farmers market" shout out at the end, Food, Inc producers). But I wasn't expecting to want to jump out of my seat and leave within the first 30 minutes because I wanted to get my blog on and start the next chapter in my life.

I know, you want to know what chapter don't you. Get ready. I'm going corn free for a year. Maybe this isn't that revolutionary. Maybe there were people doing this before "Food, Inc". Maybe other people out there saw Food, Inc before me and are already doing this. So maybe I'm not the trend setter I think I am, but at this point in time, I am, damnit.
When I started reading The Omnivore's Dilemma, like, 6 months ago (I know, Mrs.Good, I still say "like" ALOT ... BAM!), and Mr.Pollan starting talking about how corn is in virtually everything the average American eats, I got scared. Real scared. Corn is a monster! Or rather, the people in charge of what American farmers grow and what basically, the world eats, are monsters! I didn't want to be told (or not) what to eat, and not that I think corn is all that terrible for you (at least not yet anyways), but I certainly don't want it snuck into my every bite. But my business partner Karen, who is my nutritional advisor, told me not to worry about corn, its not bad. So I ignored it. But the movie brought up the monsterous corn AGAIN. It revived my fears of that those little yellow kernels. So I've decided to say, in the immortal words of Empire Records to "Damn the man!" and try to eat corn free for a year.

Now, to be honest, I think this task will be a smidge easier for me than for the average American. Yes, I consider myself to be "above average". First off, I'm a vegetarian, so I'm not eating meat that has all that corn feed stuffed in it. So I'm halfway there, right? Famous. Last. Words. As Food, Inc continued with its segment on corn, and the movie made its point that it was seriously, in, like, everything, I kinda had an "oh shit" moment. Yes, as you can see, I'm continuing on with this, what you might consider, craziness, even after I started to think about all the food that has corn in it, via corn syrup. Yes, corn syrup, I forgot about you! So I will I'm sure, DAILY, be adding new foods that are tainted with this sweetner to my sad list of "Don't Eats". And you can start taking bets on how long my little experiment will last.

So yes, I'm crazy, because corn syrup has made corn one of the, if not THE, biggest sweetener in the American diet. But it's worth a try, and will definitely be providing some humorous posts for friends and other readers out there. And probably one peeved high school English teacher.

-Jess